Author: ejanchen2

The ether is vast The ether is wide The ether exists To suck up all of your pride The ether is a void I take myself An expanseless Pit of nothing. That’s where I go Where I always know That is where All my thoughts have died. The ether exists Either as Solace of mind […]

Hi Jojo, It’s been a while since the last time I saw you. I’m not sure yet if I’ll see you again. I’m sure you’re off doing bigger and better things for yourself, and I hope your journey thus far has been as rewarding as you’d hoped.  I’m writing to you today to admit that […]

the new moon rises in november skies the scorpion fights water to astrology’s stutter the devil sneaks through card speak phantom letters with vampire tethers worming slowly excruciatingly slowly through worm grooves snaking  down the mind dripping incessant adolescent  convalescent on antidepressants waning waxing acquiescent like the skytorn, forlorn crescent  calling to tides will of […]

Today I cut myself again.  When I went outside to smoke, I sat in my rusty armchair and tried to listen to my thoughts over the music ringing through the earphones. A lone fly kept hovering over me. Every time I caught the thing idly perched on my arm, I’d try to shoo him off […]

Tattoo eyes Wrong goodbyes So much hidden  Between the lines Lonely sighs Panicked cries Sixty days Is not much time Ticking bomb Devastating songs It hasn’t been All that long. Since you’ve been, Since I’ve seen, Your messages turned From blue to green.  Tattoo eyes, Inner child, I haven’t been myself Since you died. Starry […]

Have you ever cried while eating your first meal all day? Body-wracking, silent, gut-wrenching tears trailing into your noodle soup, alone, in the middle of your living room, psychiatrist office-type glare from the light hanging above? No? Just me? I feel gutted that this emotion flows out of me so easily in front of something […]

Yesterday I drove by your grave The closest to a grave that you have here The closest now to a home you have Here in the place you left behind. I hear the lyrics to that old song  I used to like About saving a life.  Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend. […]

I am usually never awake for the sunrise. By the time the morning is underway, I am struggling to catch up. The mornings always take my breath away.  As this year draws to a close, I find myself once again reflecting on the spirit of the holiday season – and my impending birthday.  Next month […]

I am once again staring listlessly at walls. I want to detonate, because maybe then, I could make more space for the black mass excavating my sanity. I’m a sham. I’m a fucking joke. You’d think after so many years, I’d have figured out a better way to deal with myself.  Jordan, can you hear […]