LADY

lone tree’s shadow

delicately walking

middle of the parking lot

stands

a peach silhouette

red lipstick

fingertips

her body hangs

i spy

with dragon eyes

a lady silhouette

lashes drip

mascara tears

weeping leaves

framing the crown

of Death’s silhouette

pavement rising

to catch stiletto steps

ankles roll

through silent parking lot

until i see

i’ve replaced

the lady silhouette

so i feel

my slender gooseneck

extend

bony chilly hands

tying the final knot

and the

lone tree’s shadow

becomes 

my silhouette 

all this time

i can hardly see

Death’s face painted

shrouded in smoke

but i can see

He is not pale

nor proud

He is neither

man nor woman

in fact

Death was actually

the lady silhouette

in Death’s eyes

i can see

tattered dress

i thought to 

cover me up

hide 

the imperfections

i could never reconcile

never accept

never stop

from chiseling

porcelain designs

tattooed in blood

on the naked dress

that i call my skin

so Death stoops,

levels Their face

in front of mine

pockmarked

from the thorns

pushing their way

out of the branches

of the lone tree

and Death asks me

“why have you come?

what is it you want to be?”

bite my tongue

don’t speak too fast

think carefully

just like i’d been taught

Death, if anything,

is just another guest

perhaps Death

can smell fear

but i cannot

let Death smell mine

i straighten 

my back

best as i can

with all the thorns

poking through me,

look Death

dead in the eyes

voice don’t falter,

don’t fail me now

and yet when 

i open my mouth

no words fall out

so i let myself

hang 

body waving loosely

creaking in the wind

ashamed 

i didn’t know

ashamed 

i had no answer

ashamed 

even in the face of Death

i could not live up

to my own shadow

but instead

Death in Their smoky robes

parted the clouds above

even with black sun

holy water

poured down all over me

thorns dislodging

from my back

but still

i was dirty

and Death

with whispers of

a gravelly voice spoke,

“you do not 

have to hide

or be strong

for that matter

because the lady

they told you

you had to be

is not the lady

you have become”

“soon you will see

with your dragon eyes

this oddly karmic universe

is layered like an onion

cut it open and

tears will be shed

but when burnt a little

just around the edges

sweet will it be

the flavor set free

so even under

this lone smoke tree

you can release

the tendrils and wisps

of your internal sea

that is neither calm

nor cool nor collected

but rather a 

fortune wheel of fire

spinning out of control

not even holy water

can douse”

to be a lady

i was always told

i had to be silent

as a stone

even with noose

around my gooseneck

i cannot scream

for stones are rigid

stones do not feel

but what if stones

turn out hollow inside

i’ll gouge out

my bruise-black

stone-cold eyes 

so i don’t have to see

how empty i am

underneath 

the blood boiling

my naked dress

i bow my head

for the first time

since stained glass pews

i pray

for holy water

to wash me of my shame

and i hear

through my tiger ears

my gooseneck snap

so i fall 

and Death with loving arms

catches me 

plants my two feet

firmly on the ground

stares me down and

silently turns Their back

on me

so i silently turn

and this time,

barefoot i walk away

stepping on the holy water

flooding the parking lot

my pockmarked back

mirroring Death’s

i turn one more time

and i spy

with dragon eyes

Death’s silhouette 

against the lone smoke tree

i feel my internal sea

threaten to overflow

so i stay silent no longer

i wave and yell

“TILL DEATH DO US PART”

and i hear 

with tiger ears

a single croaking laugh

from the figure hanging

down the lone smoke tree

odd karmic universe,

how could it be

that you sent a

deus ex machina

down to me 

not God nor a savior

but Death and a single

lone smoke tree

bare face 

no lipstick

footsteps i take

farther away

lashes drip

mascara tears

weeping leaves

framing the crown

of my own

lady silhouette.