SOLSTICE

MOVEMENT i: MOON

If I could fly in my dreams,

Could I dance through the planets?

Fold myself into the galactic fabric,

To expose deserts dry with stardust?

If I could fly to a land far away,

Reality or not, I’d go to the moon

Close enough to brush with fingertips

But far enough that it is still a dream. //

On the stepladder to heaven,

I hope the first rung is the moon

I hope that when I traverse bony ground,

I follow the hunch of my shoulders.

Sliding down the slippery slope,

I see the wilting flower,

I call my life down on planet Earth. //

For on the moon who knows what I might find

So much like me, cracked pottery

Haunting the surface of this so-called moon.

Don’t mind my soul dissolving,

Deep into the fissures,

Cracked into the craters of this so-called moon //

And on this journey across the top of the moon

Perhaps I’ll come across the mysterious moonmen

Who stalk their prey when the sun disappears

Venture into daylight when the dark is too cold

Moonmen who have never laid eyes 

On an intricate Earthling before. //

The alarm blares and daylight filters in

Grey light reflected against tan, dismal walls

The same tan walls, day in and out,

The same routine I’ve built of you.

Knowing our timelines would never cross,

Every time I pointed out that lousy moon,

It was because I thought of you. //

Moonmen have no idea that on planet Earth

Things with you aren’t looking up

That you’ll probably leave like all the others left

That we crossed paths shortly 

To meet as lessons and never after that //

So even if you see nothing between you and me

I say that’s alright because I’ve spent 

The same amount of time thinking the same

I’ve called myself all the names you can think of to call

I’ve ruled out every possibility of you and me

Because you are tormented with a distance

That traps you in a galaxy far from mine //

But how come I just can’t let you go?

Even though distance has told me otherwise,

I think of you even when we don’t talk

And you’re the last dream that lingers

When the grey light crawls through the window

You illuminate every sunset I get to see

For as far as eyes wander, you light the sky

Until the night drinks from the lonely sea. //

When sleepy day draws cloudy curtain aside,

You ask me to never forget every fleeting second

That escapes us while we sit in this idle meadow 

Pulling out shards of minnow grass,

Tracing rabbit trails as far as eyes drift,

You lean back and say nothing this once,

Inhaling the runaway seconds even as time is still. //

Defies gravity and space and all sense of time,

How I can tell you apart amidst throngs of faces

And that one day so many months ago,

When I kept pushing the minute hand back

To solve that knobby puzzle with you bit by bit

I’ll probably get most of the details a little wrong

But I don’t mind if it makes you laugh. //

You and I ebb and flow as tides swing

Back and forth, we parley with words 

In and out, pushing to and fro

As we edge toward the great landslide

That I plummeted down headfirst away

Because no matter where the tides take me,

I’ll always find a way to gravitate back.

And maybe you won’t even notice,

But it’ll be okay, because I know.

You don’t, but I have to. //

Silence punctuates each phase of the moon

My secret paralyzing range of motion around you

So when comet explodes in millions of sparkles,

Reflected against the blade of heaven’s knife,

I hope that the brilliance dazzles your night 

And perhaps you’ll be able to understand 

Unrequited the moon’s love for your cryptic seas. //

How I imagine what you see when

You gaze out through crystalline eyes

Would you just stare if I came

And stood right in front of you?

Eyes round in disks like the moon, 

Skeleton slashed into lava barbed wire

Tattooed in fault lines that map my veins

Adorned in modern relic of silver and gold

Simple features, freckled in shades of granite

Sparse eyebrows and misshapen toes

Lopsided grin tilting dangerously to the left

Puppeteered by the the mind, chiseled stone

Nebula so dense that no logic could fathom

So I’d imagine it’s crazy to look at

From your point of view, to come across

Someone just learning how to stand. //

You walked on tightrope on each fault line

And debunked one, two, tens of my mysteries

Even though in so many ways, you

Are one of my best friends, I can’t seem to 

Break your ice and unlock the sorrows

That puzzle together the pieces of your story. //

So instead of letting me down easy

Just know that I think about you like crazy

It makes no difference yesterday or today

You can just send me on my way to the moon

Where the moonmen will maybe find me 

Different, and perhaps, scarred like the surface

Of their so-called moon, they who have never 

Laid eyes on a human being before

Will find this Earthling beautiful. //

If you’re awake late enough in the dead of night,

Look out over the waters and up ahead

Toward the incandescent light of that so-called moon

Stolen from the sun to crown the darkness.

If you are curious and want to know where I am,

Wait until the shadows threaten to swallow,

Remember in that fleeting runaway second,

You can find me when the so-called moon sets. //

Almond disk eyes and lustrous black hair,

Yes, the very Earthling that made them stare,

Crashing into one of the craters of moonmen lairs

Bid the tides come and go as they dare

I will learn to breathe the moonmen’s air

And fix everything that calls for internal repair. //

My mind spends much time wandering in space

Even if the world stays in the same exact place

While it makes the moon its home base,

I am far from you on the moon’s arid face. //

Maybe I’ll find you after my time across the Milky Way,

And we’ll meet eyes and yours will dance as if to say,

“Bet cosmic dreams aren’t everything that they seem.”

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MOVEMENT ii: SUN

The sun hides itself behind a bright blackhole

For the closer you orbit, the sooner you’ll see

Oven fire burning on flaming dark coals

Sparking the malfunction laced with apology //

Sun and moon transcend dimensions of time

Moon lighting up shadow in the beacon of sun

Pressing against layers of fractal star chimes, 

Sun is a force of nature that stops for no one. //

Little does he know how he is that very ball of fire,

Casting his everglow to sear the farthest stars, 

Willing every pathway to reflect his endless desires,

Singing my emotions and mocking my bizarre,

Fueled with toxic gas, exploding on metal wire,

It’s gaslight, it blinds when it’s poured along scars. //

Take me to the sun so I can walk on molten light, 

Feel its rays puncture my jutting cement walls,

Maybe I’ll suffocate and noise will turn white,

As I wrestle with fumes, smoke cushions my free fall. //

Perhaps the only way to tear off all my masks,

Is to utilize the trickery of the sun’s piercing flames

Revealing from surface to core is a mighty task

Only deception can ease my bubbling shame. //

I am just some experiment, some leap of faith

Some basket case not even a circus could tame,

Who fled to the moon to hide from eternal wraiths

So I thought the sun could beat me at m y own game. //

Who knew the sun would splinter nearly all my bones,

But offer lifeline when I was melting on his scalding stones? //

Sunlight ensnares the moon in blazing tug-of-war,

Tangled hair, legs, arms, scrambling to leave by dawn

Moon washed up onto the sun’s beckoning, shiny shore

Only to shut her out the next moment and pass her on. //

Knocking again when the candle spark is gone,

I’m tired of always being your second-best

His rays intensely burning his yellow starry lawn

Into my mind when I lay myself down to rest. //

In my brief affair as the sun’s celestial guest,

I argued with fire against my blade ricochet,

Realized that I could never pass his impossible test,

And see that the piercing flare had led me astray. //

I think it safe to keep my distance from the sun,

Glaring truth tells me he will never be the one. 

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MOVEMENT iii: STARS

Cookie cutter pastures, fields of gold

Stars are alleyways that riddle through

Sleek canyons of asteroids carving centerfold

Into valleys fault lining planets stacked by queue //

My arms carry constellations of their own

Jagged borders strewn haphazardly 

Waterfalling into deep abyss of aching bone

Unearthing the core, the secret spectacularly //

Did you know that moons are hollow inside?

Fueled by the light of passing dimming stars,

This moon is strong enough to control the tide

But not so much that it gets in the way of Mars. //

Alone in its orbit out in the graveyard of stars,

The moon counts lightbulbs of mind-blowing tales,

I’ll go look for one of those Star Wars cantina bars

And replay the memories in visceral detail. //

I imagine a hallway with door after door

Each, an epitaph for stars after they fade

Behind, live moments to remind the core

That although stars leave, I wish they stayed. //

Cluttered mailboxes with no return address

But look at these postcards from around the world

I always watch these stars glow and fluoresce

As they experience joyride with toes tightly curled //

I’ve soared through dozens of rotating night skies

Camouflaging in the flush of dawn’s dewy cheeks

Chasing astrology to align my stars with your eyes

Crossing timelines to meet you at the crown peak. //

Five doors fault lined, one by one, so neat

Diving headfirst into gentle obscurity 

I stagger through landscapes so bittersweet

Especially when I live them with pearl-like purity. //

Each door creaks when I push it ajar

As the light bulbs hum in harmony, 

I experience the blossoming of a naive star

Until its embers cleave into your lonely sea. //

Lay me in this bed of twilight stars,

Tell the moon she is stitched with heartbreak.

I hate good nights but I’ve travelled far,

I say good night to this dream and dare to wake. //

Doors disintegrate, I star step back to planet moon

Before she disappears from her internal black hole,

I will blow out the embers, and I hope soon

The wind will blow me back down to ground control.

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MOVEMENT iv: EARTH

As I crash back down to planet Earth,

I remember the moonmen I left behind

Who sniffed my hair and clicked and howled

But left me to my devices after that. 

Moonmen are fragments of forgotten dreams 

Guards of the ivory citadel my mind keeps

Letters I wrote but never let you read. //

Before I wake, I have to reminisce just a tad 

Because even though the sun burned me alive

And the moon is the last stop for departing stars,

I dined with the planets and took a celestial cab

Toward Milky Way Station, bound for Andromeda

Just to maintain social distance from the sun. 

But dreams stay bright because they don’t last

So I blew down with storms in the stratosphere. //

While Earth’s gravity anchors me to reality, 

I can no longer avoid the pressing matter of you.

Maybe the seconds ran somewhere far away,

But I guess I did the same exact thing.

This is what I am just realizing now:

Dreams don’t mean all that much anymore

When they’re the fault line between us. //

Honestly not much has changed while I was gone,

Tan are the walls and grey is the light, 

But catharsis has untangled toxins inside me,

Scattering the lies I told to hide from myself.

The lies that pushed you to the back of my mind,

Lies that sent me skyward for cleansing. //

I don’t care what moonmen or stars tell me to think, 

To them, I’m just an Earthling, lost and confused.

But all Earthlings are human, no exceptions,

Our feelings mirror our planet’s temporal moods, 

And we grow with the landscapes around us.

So no matter how harsh or unkind the world is,

I just want Planet Earth to be my home. //

As I awaken and start to go about my day,

I want to share with you one last secret.

My head has always been stuck in the clouds 

I don’t think my feet have ever touched the ground

Because the truth is, I’ve never been afraid to fall. 

I am just looking for a safe place to land. //

For I am human and Earth is where I belong. 

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MOVEMENT v: YOU

The truth is I’ve fallen more times than a few

I’ll admit it never hurts less every time that I do

Perhaps gravity will pull me down closer to you

Or I’ll keep seeking tesseracts to find new views //

But alas every vacation must come to an end

Be it peaceful or painful, I suppose it depends

On the time, energy and money that one spends

Or if one is in the company of irreplaceable friends. //

There’s more stardust than friends in the spacetime vacuum

I was hoping for a museum compartmentalized by room

It’s really just a playground for rocks to hurtle to their doom

I think I’m about ready for my life down here to resume. //

I know in the moment I lay my eyes on your face

Not a second will have passed since I left for space,

You were the Earth, stars and sea in this heavenly chase

But now, I just want to be with you in the same exact place.  //

Meet me past midnight at the moon’s watery throne

Tiptoe past the slinking tides or else my cover is blown

I’ll be watching the moon disappear, skipping stones,

And wondering how long I have left to be on my own. //

You were right, cosmic dreams are nothing to reality.

But that universe is only for your eyes to see,

Or maybe you’ve already been and you are the key

To unlock the fault lines that crisscross all over me. //

So if the day ever comes that there is a possibility,

For there even to be the chance of you and me, 

Take your time, because I’ll be waiting patiently

For the moon to hold hands with the Earth’s sea. //

If outer space has taught me anything at all, 

It’s that minutes and days don’t matter in free fall.

So if love is as strange or bizarre as the moon, 

Then perhaps you and I will collide again soon.